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Carina Cox
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 09, 2017 6:44 am    Post subject: Confessions Reply with quote

There are few things more ridiculous than a grown woman playing a teenager, and Carina embodied at least one of them. Not only was she at least ten years older than Marsinah, her character in Kismet, but she was also 27 weeks pregnant when it came time to fit her for her costume. By the end of the run, she would be 30 weeks gone. Everyone was hoping that the bump didn't decide to pop until after the show closed. But she couldn't say no when Mataya and Ludo offered her the role. It might be her last chance to perform on a stage ever again. So bump or no bump, she was going to give it her best shot.

"Stand still, Carina, before I accidentally poke you with a pin," Miranda scolded gently. "It'll only take a few more minutes. Promise!" she told the half-elf as she worked her way around the dress, busily tucking and pinning. She'd taken one look at the costumes and decided to re-do the lot of them, with a little help from a certain warlock, but Carina's costume needed extra care and needed to made in such a way that hid the baby bump that was becoming more obvious by the day.

"And you're sure we'll be able to get it off and the next one on without anyone seeing anything they shouldn't?" the young half-elf asked in concern. Quick changes were the bane of any performer's life, but this particular quick change was happening on stage, in the middle of a song. She could be excused a little terror at the thought of it.

"Yes, yes, no worries," she assured her, as she moved around her side. "This is going to have an elasticized neckline so you can just pull it down and step out of it and into the next one." This was, admittedly, Miranda's first attempt at creating costumes for the theater, but she was almost a natural, calling on all the little tricks she'd learned over the years to make this work.

Carina nodded, trying not to move too much. It had been a long time since she'd been fitted for a costume, but she was delighted that Kismet would be her last performance. "Sorry, I know you know what you're doing," she apologized. "I'm just nervous."

"Nothing to be nervous of, sweetheart," Miranda assured her. "Almost done!" She made sure to be careful of the little bump that Carina was carrying, knowing her cargo was precious. It would have been easier to cover that bump had they been doing nearly any other musical but this one, but Miranda knew how important this was to Carina, especially since it might be her last performance, at least for a while. "When are you due?" she asked, partly out of curiosity and partly to ease the elf girl's nervousness with conversation.

"Toward the end of May," Carina told her with a nervous smile. It wasn't so much the prospect of being a mother that alarmed her. It was more the knowledge that this child carried all the hopes of Arandir's people. If their child could be born safely, survive to term and be healthy, then there was hope for the elves who had come out of Ilyethlin. "I think we got lucky in everything still being pretty small."

"Oh, that's not too far off. It'll be here before you know it," Miranda mused aloud as she put the last pin in place and sat back on her heels with a sigh to have a look. "There! All finished. Now, for the gown," she said, moving to her feet to help Carina out of one dress and into another. "Do you know what you're having yet?"

"A baby, hopefully," Carina grimaced laughingly, embarrassed all over again as the costume slipped off, leaving her in her underwear. She was built like an elf, but for a slightly more rounded look to her hips that betrayed her human mother. Her bump was small, but perfectly formed. With luck, it wouldn't decide to really start growing until the middle of March.

"Very funny," Miranda replied with a smile. "Mataya tells me you and Arandir are leaving the theater," she said further as she helped the half-elf get one costume off and the other on. Embarrassed or not, they were all alone, and Miranda hardly batted an eye at the girl's half-clad appearance. She'd seen countless people in their underwear over the years - men and woman, models and actors, and just plain regular people.

"We left before Christmas, really," Carina admitted in a rueful tone. "It's so odd. I spent so long working so hard to get on stage, and now ... it just isn't as important as everything else in my life. Not that I'm not grateful to be given this role," she rushed to clarify. "Marsinah is the best way to say goodbye."

"Why are you leaving?" Miranda asked, not because she was nosy, but because she was genuinely interested in the young woman's story. Miranda, herself, had recently changed careers, finding herself joining the theater just as Carina and Aran were leaving it, it seemed. But then, nothing every stayed the same for long in Rhy'Din.

"It's a little complicated," Carina chuckled softly, relieved when the next costume touched her skin. She wasn't used to being so exposed, even when it was just her and another woman. "Arandir's people, they needed somewhere safe to come. They were being wiped out on his homeworld. Less than a hundred of them survived, but my grandparents' community - Anarven, outside the city - they took them in. But he's still their prince, and they need him there, with them. And, you know, I can't really prance around on a stage much longer, the condition I'm in."

Miranda paused for a single heartbeat, a little surprised by the story Carina was telling her, and a little sad, too. "I'm sorry," she said with a sigh, her voice soft with sympathy and sincerity. "And here, they end up on a world that's dealing with its own struggles. It can't be easy for any of you," she added further, wondering if there was some way she could help.

Carina, to her own surprise, found herself smiling. "It was hard, at first," she admitted. "Arandir's people were afraid of humans, and humans make up almost half the population they joined. But ... Well, we had a little trouble in December. Some idiots decided that attacking Anarven was a good idea, and a lot of Arandir's people panicked. But they also watched as the humans, and the dwarves, and the halflings, who all live with them ... we all stood between the idiots who wanted to cause trouble, and the elves they were so determined to harm. I guess you could say that the troubles here brought our little community together."

"It sounds like your community could teach the rest of Rhy'Din a lesson," Miranda said, as she started to work on fitting the gown so that it not only fit the half-elf well, but would be comfortable and easy to get out of. "Is there anything you need?" she asked, but what she was really asking was if there was any way she could help or if there was anything Carina or anyone at the settlement needed.

"What don't we need?" Carina chuckled, shaking her head briefly. "We're still living in cramped quarters. The ground's still frozen solid, so no foundations can be put down for new homes, and even that will take weeks when the thaw comes. We tried the temporary housing Mataya arranged for us, but it was so drafty. I, um ... please don't tell her I said that."

Miranda stepped back a moment, not to examine her own handiwork, but to frown at what Carina was telling her. "Well, you can stop worrying," she said, without much hesitation. "Whatever you need, consider it done." What was the point of being ridiculously rich if you couldn't help people when they were in need of help? She knew if Humphrey and the other Grangers knew about their plight, they wouldn't hesitate to help.

"What?" Carina's jaw dropped as she stared at Miranda. "Oh, I-I-I ... we couldn't, it would be taking advantage of ... Seriously, we'll get by. Things will get better when spring arrives and we can start working properly."
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Carina Cox
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 09, 2017 6:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

"Nonsense," Miranda said with a smile, as she went back to work on the dress that would turn the pretty half-elf into the beautiful Marsinah. "Taking advantage of what? Besides, it's almost spring. The ground will be thawing soon, and we can start building." Keyword, we; not you or even they, but we. Of course, Miranda didn't mean she would be doing the building personally.

Despite her natural resistance to the help being offered without being sought, Carina couldn't help softening a little at the thought that her child might be born in a home of its own, if Miranda was this determined. She loved her grandparents, but spending the winter living in the same house as both them and her parents had been trying for both her and Arandir. "We have all the plans drawn up," she offered shyly. "Everyone knows where their home is going to be. We just don't have the manpower or the technology to break frozen ground and start building yet. Oh!" She gasped, remembering something she was supposed to do while in town. "You wouldn't know which of the thrift stores does bulk, would you?"

Miranda's thoughts wandered to a certain warlock again, but she had asked so much of him already, and she had a feeling building a house didn't fall under the heading of "simple magic". Still, the Grangers was nothing if not resourceful, and she had a feeling once word spread, those homes would go home in a jiffy. She blinked out of her thoughts at Carina's question. "Thrift stores? Why do you ask?" she wondered aloud.

Carina sighed, feeling guilty just for mentioning it now. She had a feeling Miranda was going to try and pay for something she had already budgeted for. "Blankets and cloth for clothing," she admitted reluctantly, one hand rising before Miranda could open her mouth. "Which I can pay for. I just need to find out where I can get them from."

"Isn't anyone throwing you a baby shower?" Miranda asked curiously and carefully, several pins hanging from between her lips as she measured and tucked and pinned.

Well, that came out of nowhere. Carina narrowed her eyes, staring at Miranda with full blown suspicion. She had, after all, already had to talk Jonathan Granger out of pretty much throwing open his bank account for Anarven, and Mataya had not been much easier to convince otherwise. This Granger did not seem the kind to back down in the face of abject groveling. "Why?" she asked in a suspicious tone.

"Because that's what people do when someone is having their first baby," she explained, once she'd fished the pins from between her lips. "I suppose it's more of a human tradition," she admitted, and even so, not all humans followed such traditions. "It's sort of like a party to welcome the baby."

"It's not something that I've ever heard of," Carina admitted, though she was still slightly suspicious of the way the subject seemed to have changed so abruptly. "My mother is human, but she never said anything about that. She's more concerned with feeding me potions to keep me healthy."

"Like I said, not everyone follows that tradition. It comes from Earth, I think, but not everyone on Earth does it either," she explained further. Miranda made a mental note to get in touch with Carina's mother, but she wouldn't force a baby shower on them, if they didn't want one. "Carina," Miranda started with a soft sigh, a serious but compassionate look on her face. "Try not to think of it as charity so much as friends trying to help."

To her credit, Carina did not instantly grow defensive, or try to push the offer away. She held Miranda's gaze with guilty eyes. "It's not my decision to make," she said quietly. "They can call me a princess as much as they like, but I'm just me. Arandir's their prince; Farlen is Anarven's First. I'm just eye candy, that's all. What's important about me is this." She ran her hand gently over the swell of her womb. "Can I talk to them about it, though? They'll want to pay for anything that comes to us. We're ... we're too proud to take charity, even from friends."

"There are others ways to repay kindness, Carina," Miranda pointed out with that warm almost motherly smile of hers, but she didn't want to push the matter. She'd talk to Carina's mother and see if there was some way they could help without making too much of a fuss. As far as the housing went though, that was another matter.

"I don't know if they'd even listen to me right now," the half-elf said uncertainly. "Most of Arandir's people are horrified that he agreed to perform on a stage, and none of them approve of me doing it. They're all so certain that I'm going to kill the baby just by singing a few songs in front of an audience."

"It sounds like they have a lot to learn about Rhy'Din," Miranda mused aloud, as she went back to her altering of the dress. "Do you feel up to being on stage right now?" she asked, assuming neither Carina or Arandir was being forced into performing.

"I want to," Carina insisted. "I've missed it so much. And it's my last chance." Not that she would ever tell Arandir this. She had voluntarily given up her dreams to support her husband and their people, and she would hold to that promise. But that didn't mean that she wasn't going to grieve for the loss of her dreams.

"Why? Can't you be a princess and an actress?" Miranda asked further. After all, this was Rhy'Din; anything was possible. Even if Arandir's people thought Carina shouldn't be an actress, in the end, it was what Carina and Arandir thought that mattered.

"Because what they need is the princess," Carina said softly. She felt ashamed of herself for even thinking this way, much less for confiding in a near-stranger about it. "They need me to be their prince's wife. And I can't do that and be on the stage as well. It's bigger than I am."

"I gave up on a dream once, for different reasons than you. There were other things to consider, other lives that were more important than mine. I thought that dream was gone forever, but I was wrong. Never say never, Carina. Someday, when the time is right, you might change your mind," she told her, though their circumstances were very different.

"That's a nice wish." It was said so softly, it might almost have been missed in the rustle of cloth as Miranda worked on the costume. Taking in a deep breath, Carina raised her eyes to the mirror, eyeing the rich fabric critically. "This is going to take some practice with the girls, getting me out of that one and into this one in the space of one verse," she commented.

"Ah, but most of this can be worn beneath the other, so all you have to do is attach the skirt and veil and voila! You go from peasant girl to princess in a snap!" Miranda told her. "Trust me, Carina. I may not know much about the theater, but I know clothes. Besides, we still have time to fix it if anything goes wrong in rehearsal."

"I do trust you," Carina promised her, deliberately pushing away from the subject that was close to breaking her heart at the moment. She'd get over it, but it was going to be tough getting through Kismet without showing Arandir how upset she was. "I've never had to do a quick change on stage while in the spotlight before, that's all."

"Practice makes perfect, dear," Miranda told her, cheerily. "Have you talked to your husband about all this?" she asked, as casually as she could, unable to let that subject go. "I can tell you that having a baby is a full-time job, but they don't stay babies forever." Then again, Carina's child would only be half human, and Miranda wasn't too sure at what rate half-elves aged.
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Carina Cox
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 09, 2017 6:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

"I'm not talking to Arandir about this," Carina said stubbornly. "He's got enough to worry about without me making things worse. It's not going to kill me, Miranda. And besides, I'll be too busy after May to even think about it."

"Are you happy about the baby?" Miranda pressed further. Maybe it was too forward of her; maybe she was being too nosy, but it worried her a little that Carina seemed so upset when she should be over the moon with happiness at the prospect of having a baby, even if it meant her career would have to be put on hold for a while.

Carina sighed, looking down at her bump for a moment. "That's ... not an easy question to answer," she admitted softly. "When it was just me and Arandir, I was so happy. And then all the trouble with his people, and he came back a different man. Still the man I love, but different, all the same. There's so much pressure on me. This is the first child of a new generation. Arandir's people haven't birthed any children but him for almost two centuries. What if something happens? It'll be my fault. And I don't know if they would ever forgive me for it."

Miranda frowned, settling back on her heels to look up at the girl, that look of concern on her face again. "Are you sure it's Arandir's people putting all that pressure on you and not yourself?" she asked her pointedly. She didn't really know much about the circumstances or about the elves in question, but she knew a little about Arandir from the time she'd spent fitting him for his outfit as Caliph. "You know, all he ever talks about is you." And that was saying something, as the half-elf was not known for being very outgoing.

Carina managed a wan smile. "Please don't tell him," she begged softly. "He gave up so much to come here in the first place. He lost his family in bringing his people back here. He needs to be with his people, and I won't abandon him for the theater. It's just a dream, Miranda. Dreams change."

"Dreams are important, Carina. You should never give up on your dreams. Arandir wouldn't want you to give up on your dreams either," Miranda pointed out, but there wasn't much more she could do than that. Carina had to make her own decisions for better or worse.

"Please." Carina shook her head sadly. "Can we stop talking about it? The decision's been made." She turned her eyes back to her reflection, avoiding her own saddened gaze for a long moment as she considered the costume.

Miranda knew better than to push her luck, but it saddened her that the girl seemed so sad when she should be happy. "Can I tell you a story?" she asked instead, taking a different tack. Maybe if she came at this another way, Carina would understand.

"You still have one more costume to pin me into, I'm not going anywhere until you say so," Carina pointed out, brushing her sadness to one side with a soft smile. It was easy to see how she had managed to keep her distress a secret from her husband; all she had to do was keep away from the topics that upset her, and her naturally balanced temperament kept her smiling.

"And I think we're just about finished with this one," Miranda told her. "Ready?" she asked, setting aside her box of pins to help her out of the costume. "Once upon a time, there was a girl whose dream was to become a fashion designer. Not just any fashion designer, but the most famous fashion designer who ever lived!" It was already becoming obvious this story was going to be an autobiography.

Carina nodded, moving to help unhook the skirt from her waist as Miranda began her recitation. Once upon a time, indeed. She couldn't help smiling at the sheer enthusiasm being thrown into this re-telling, however, even if it seemed to be pointed already.

"It was all she'd ever dreamed about from the time she was a small girl. It was all she'd ever wanted, so off she went to university to get her degree - the first step in accomplishing her dream. And then she met a boy and fell in love. Now, that boy had not been part of the dream. Love had never been part of the plan. But the first time she saw him, well, it was love at first sight," Miranda told her, getting a little lost in the story as she helped Carina out of the dress.

Carina's smile softened as she listened. She knew that feeling. The boy had never been part of her dream, either, but she knew she would never regret turning aside from the dream to be with him.

"He was handsome, and shy, and awkward, and everything she'd ever wanted in a boy, and the best part of all was that he seemed as enamored of her as she was of him." Miranda smirked a little at the next part. "Of course, she cheated a little in her chasing of him, but he didn't seem to mind. They became inseparable, and all of a sudden, that dream of becoming the world's greatest fashion designer didn't seem as important anymore. Then, came graduation, and the girl found out she was pregnant. Now, you would think this was a good thing, but the timing was all wrong. You see, soon after graduation, the boy was going away. He had no choice, really, because he had a duty to something that was bigger than him, bigger than them both, bigger even than their child. The girl was sad and angry. She didn't want him to go and she didn't want to have that baby alone, but she had no choice. She had to make a decision, but in the end, she decided to keep that baby and raise it on her own. The baby was a daughter - a wonderful, beautiful, angel - and every time she looked at her, she saw a little bit of him, and slowly, the anger went away, and she knew she'd been blessed."

Carina frowned gently, unsettled by the way this story was going. What was Miranda saying, exactly? That if she wanted to keep her dreams, she should give up her husband and child? That love and dreams were not compatible at all? The decision had already been made, after all - Arandir and their family, their people, were more important than her dreams.
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Carina Cox
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 09, 2017 6:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Miranda didn't notice the frown, busy as she was working on getting Carina dressed and fitted in her third and final costume, as well as a little lost in the telling of her story. "She didn't really think she'd ever see him again. Their lives had taken them in very different directions, but as it happened, they kept in touch. The years passed, and the girl grew up and achieved her dream of becoming a successful designer, even while raising a child, and eventually, that daughter grew into a woman herself. And then, something unexpected happened, and she was reunited with that boy she'd loved so long ago and who she still loved with all her heart. He'd grown up too, and become a man, but like her, he'd never married, never met anyone he loved the way he loved her. And so, they were reunited and got married and adopted another child to raise together as a family. They got a second chance at their happily ever after before it was too late."

She fell silent suddenly, a soft smile on her face, as that story was her own, though she'd simplified the telling of it, for Carina's sake. And the point of the story? Maybe she'd share that once she realized she'd forgotten to mention that part.

"It sounds as though she had a very blessed life," Carina said softly, though she didn't understand quite what the point of that little recitation had been. Arandir wasn't leaving her; quite the contrary, they were growing closer because of all this. Leaving distractions like the theater behind to move forward together.

"She has," Miranda agreed, as Carina drew her out of her thoughts. "The point is, if you really want it, you can have your cake and eat it, too, Carina. The best of both worlds. It won't be easy, but if you want it badly enough, you can do it. I did. I raised my daughter on my own and still had a career, and now I'm doing it all over again with Rufus' help. I know Rufus isn't a prince and he doesn't have the same responsibilities that Arandir has, but I'm sure if he knew how much the theater means to you, you'd find a way to work it out together."

"But you didn't have all the answers right away, did you?" Carina pointed out in a gentle tone. "Is it so important that I absolutely have to drop this on him when he is already carrying so much? I can't do that to him, Miranda. Perhaps, when things have settled and our people have homes of their own, perhaps then. But not now. I won't do that to him."

"I didn't say you have to do it now, Carina. I'm just saying, you don't have to give up on your dreams. Things have a way of working out," she said, not wanting to push her luck or the matter any further. Carina seemed to have her mind set, but Miranda had a feeling once she had that baby, everything was going to change.

"One way or another," the half-elf agreed softly. She looked down at herself thoughtfully, a minor concern making itself known in her mind. "Is there room in these for the bump if it decides to start growing properly in the next two weeks?" she asked worriedly. "Mom said something about women getting huge really fast in the third trimester."

"We'll worry about that when and if it happens. I've left enough room to take these out of we need to. Try not to worry so much, Carina. If it starts getting snug, just let me know and we'll make some adjustments, okay?" Miranda told her, as she finished up pinning the alterations in place. She wasn't sure if it was the hormones or not, but she thought the half-elf was doing more than her fair share of worrying.

"Sorry." Carina stopped fidgeting, avoiding her own gaze in the mirror as she studied the last of the three costumes. It was, in her opinion, the best of the three - more comfortable, certainly. It was almost a shame she didn't have much center-stage work in this one.

"You look lovely, you know," Miranda told her with a soft smile. "You're gonna steal the show," she added, that smile turning to a grin. "I hope you like the costumes. They're a little last minute, but I'm happy with how they turned out."

"They're lovely," Carina promised her. "Much better than those Arabian Nights knock-offs the secret police were trying to get us in - oh!" Her eyes went wide, guilt coloring her expression as she looked at Miranda. "I don't mean you, or the ladies who stayed on," she rushed to assure the older woman. "Really, you're amazing!"

Miranda laughed. "It's a good thing they left then, isn't it?" she said, moving to her feet and stepping back to have a better look at her. "There. How's that? Not too tight or too loose? I want you to be comfortable." She seemed to take no offense at Carina's remark; in fact, she was glad they were gone. Their loss was her gain, anyway.

"It's perfect," Carina assured her, twisting this way and that to admire the brightly-colored costume that adorned her. She could tell that the only reason she could see the little bump at her waist was because she knew it was there. On stage, unless the audience was aware of her pregnancy, it would be masterfully disguised in the myriad layers that shimmered about her. "Really, it's lovely, Miranda. You're a genius."

She smiled at the girl in the mirror, glad Carina was pleased with her costume, but a little worried about her state of mind. "Try to be happy, Carina," Miranda told her, noticing that she hadn't really smiled much since she'd arrived for her fitting. "Arandir adores you, you're having a baby, and you've got your whole life ahead of you. I know it seems hard now, but believe me, it will get easier. The best part is that you have each other."

"I am happy," Carina insisted softly. "I'm just a little sad right now, as well. It'll pass. Don't worry about me. Marsinah won't have even a hint of sadness in her, I promise." Because she knew she was good at acting, and that just made it worse, in a way.

"I'm not talking about Marsinah; I'm talking about you," Miranda said with a sigh. "All right. Let's get you out of that so you can be Carina again," she said, frowning a little and wishing she could have been of more help, but she wasn't the girl's mother, and she didn't want to butt in too much.

Carina was silent as they got her out of her costume, and back into her own clothes. But she turned to Miranda, catching the woman's hand in her own to step close and kiss her cheek. "Thank you."

Miranda blinked, a little surprised at the show of gratitude, as she'd been starting to think she was just being a buttinsky. "No need to thank me. That's what friends are for," she assured her, with that motherly smile of hers, holding her hand just a moment longer than necessary before giving it a pat. "If there's anything you need, anything at all, don't hesitate to call." And she was not just talking about costume problems.

"Well, you didn't tell me where the bulk thrift stores are, so I definitely will be calling," Carina admitted, and there was a flicker of a teasing smile on her face. She might be tired, and heartsore, and worrying over every little thing, but she wasn't broken and she wasn't defeated. She'd get through this.

Miranda laughed. "Sweetie, if I knew where they were, I'd tell you!" she admitted. It was hard to tell if she was fibbing, but it didn't really matter. She had it in mind to talk to Carina's mother the first chance she got and make sure the couple had everything they needed to get a good start in life.

Carina giggled softly. "Nice try," she murmured, stepping away to shrug into her coat. "Aran should be waiting for me by now. Fingers crossed I don't tear anything during the techie rehearsal, huh?"

Miranda crossed her fingers on both hands and held them up for Carina to see. "Fingers crossed!" she proclaimed, though she had a feeling the girl would be just fine, and not just where the rehearsal was concerned.

And if she wasn't, well ... at least now Carina had confided in someone. She'd know where to come if she needed to confide a little more.
A good teacher, like a good entertainer, first must hold his audience's attention, then he can teach his lesson.
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