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Risa Jones
Young Wyrm
Young Wyrm


Joined: 16 Sep 2007
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 28, 2017 3:12 pm    Post subject: Glitterati [Insert X-files theme song playing somewhere] Reply with quote

Carried frequently in a large purse by a large, generally hot-pink personality was this monstrosity of a personal diary slash bullet journal slash doodle book slash...everything:





____________
OOC
Q: What is this?
A: It's Risa Jone's diary, thoughts, bullet journal, writings and other things!

Q: Would my character know about this?
A: Only if Risa physically showed you -- unless of course your character has super powers to read stuff without being shown. If that's the case, I would just pretty please ask you to not use the writing here in character without discussing it thoroughly with me first, thanks!

Q: Then...why write this where people can see it?
A: Well! I love writing! Even though I am not very good at it. And I love sharing a little bit about my characters and I thought this might be a good means to show a bit about Risa to either frighten players away ( Razz Just kidding! I think...) or draw them in if interested. Thanks for reading!
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Risa Jones
Young Wyrm
Young Wyrm


Joined: 16 Sep 2007
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Can Be Found: Rhydin
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 28, 2017 5:17 pm    Post subject: December 25th, 2017 Reply with quote


_________________
"Hi! I'm fat!"
"Noooo, you're beautiful!"
"Oh honey, I said I was fat, not ugly."
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Risa Jones
Young Wyrm
Young Wyrm


Joined: 16 Sep 2007
Posts: 53
See this user's pet
Can Be Found: Rhydin
1636.80 Silver Crowns

Items

PostPosted: Fri Dec 29, 2017 10:46 am    Post subject: December 28th, 2017 Reply with quote


_________________
"Hi! I'm fat!"
"Noooo, you're beautiful!"
"Oh honey, I said I was fat, not ugly."
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Risa Jones
Young Wyrm
Young Wyrm


Joined: 16 Sep 2007
Posts: 53
See this user's pet
Can Be Found: Rhydin
1636.80 Silver Crowns

Items

PostPosted: Fri Dec 29, 2017 11:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

INTERLUDE I

Letters to my daughter:

Risa,

You are one week old.

I ache.

I cannot say one moment or the other if the ache is good or bad. The midwives tell me that with each feeding, the pain will ease; that it is good for me, to recover, that it helps internal healing. But by gods, it hurts. And makes me so sleepy, I have to pinch or give myself a little slap not to accidentally fall on you while you eat. It aches.

But then there is a lull. Your tiny cherub's mouth pauses (thank gods, did you know I have to lather myself up? Apparently, this causes chapping. My girl, my girl. If you ever have a baby and feed it naturally--people forget to tell you about this. Get a good balm for yourself. You will need it.) and your long sweet lashes sweep closed. You smell like angels. I think you do, anyway. I do not know what angels smell like or even if there is a god or pantheons of --though no doubt you will hear me call on them over the years -- but I swear. This smell must be of them. It is peace. It is warmth of skin with love. It is safety. It is golden. I love the smell of your warm little head. You have three hairs right now. They are golden red, like mine. Your eyes are blue.

You do not look anything like your father. I am happy, so, so happy about this. He is already gone. He was gone the moment he knew of you, before I even knew of you. I am glad he is gone. I do not miss him. I do not think about what it would be like to have him here. To see you. I do not.

I ache.
This is the way life is I think. Someday, you will ache as well. But that is not yet and I feel love swell inside me akin to when you grew there and I swear I could fight a dragon with nothing but my spite, tooth and nail for you. It aches inside me. I cherish it.


I ache, in my heart.
It is the good kind. I would do anything for you. I love you.
_________________
"Hi! I'm fat!"
"Noooo, you're beautiful!"
"Oh honey, I said I was fat, not ugly."
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Risa Jones
Young Wyrm
Young Wyrm


Joined: 16 Sep 2007
Posts: 53
See this user's pet
Can Be Found: Rhydin
1636.80 Silver Crowns

Items

PostPosted: Sat Dec 30, 2017 1:52 pm    Post subject: December 30th, 2017 Reply with quote

Motivational journal spread for today:



I couldn't handle living there anymore. The real world, I mean. Wait...no...for a lot of people earth isn't the real world at all. At least, it's not their world, I mean, and so for them it's not real. But it was way too real for me.

Does that make me a coward? I think it does.

But I tried to get as many people here as I could, right? There's still a lot of people there, like my Aunt, who still thinks I need a lot of therapy and good medication. I have nothing against either but I have stopped arguing with her about Rhy'Din. I don't even know how she can come visit mom and still not believe it's another place entirely. She refuses. Her ignorance...I can't. She voted for Tr**p too and I've already exhausted myself trying to explain why I couldn't stay in that country anymore.

There's ignorance and hate here, too, I make no mistakes in thinking there isn't...but it is ....not as acceptable. Like, nobody egged my apartment here and wrote "diek" on my door in spray paint if I went on a date with another woman, so there's that.

I still have my absentee ballot or overseas ballot. So you can bet your sparkly behind I will be not voting for orange mccheeto ****face. Ever.

It's just. It's too much. It was too much. You fight and you fight and you fight and it never gets anywhere. Seven steps forward and forty nine backward. People wanting to know your genitals before using the bathroom. People dictating toys for kids based on what's between their legs. People believing that who you sleep with should dictate whether or not you get treated like a god damn human being. People who tell women if they didn't want to get raped they shouldn't have worn that / breathed side ways / walked anywhere / had a shape / wore make up. People using religion as an excuse to harm each other.... It's insane. It's driving me insane.

I left a good job at a company in the graphics department. I feel bad about that, and almost guilty about being a coward but I just needed a break. A moment to go somewhere where people honestly didn't CARE who you were or what you did or who you did (as long as it's with consenting adults......And let's not even touch on the subject here about those who...well frikk. Wrongness is everywhere there are humans but ANYWAY)

So I left. Came back here.
It feels like if I fight here, it MEANS something. Even if it's a fight that only concerns a small amount of people. Things change and they remain the same but mostly even a SMALL change means a victory, personally or no. That's what it feels like HERE, to me.
I guess I am a coward.
I guess it means something to admit it though. Gotta work on the rest.

_________________
"Hi! I'm fat!"
"Noooo, you're beautiful!"
"Oh honey, I said I was fat, not ugly."
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Risa Jones
Young Wyrm
Young Wyrm


Joined: 16 Sep 2007
Posts: 53
See this user's pet
Can Be Found: Rhydin
1636.80 Silver Crowns

Items

PostPosted: Sun Dec 31, 2017 1:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

INTERLUDE II

THE GIRL AND THE ROBOT
P A S T



I go mental every time you leave for work
You never seem to know when to stop
I never know when you'll return
I'm in love with a robot*


It wasn't the fast cars. It wasn't the American-dream penthouse, or the hot tub, or the kitchen that looked like it was made to be on those home and kitchen shows or the old re-runs of MTV cribs. It wasn't the money. It wasn't the fact that he looked like he belonged on the front of a magazine either. It helped, yes. She was one hundred percent honest with herself. She knew she'd been so lucky. And there were times when she had looked at him when he had been bent over laptops or papers and simply stared in awe and wonder: how did I end up with him? How?

In the night, call you up and
Wanna know when you're coming home
Don't deny me, call me back
I'm so alone


It was something else. It wasn't, and wouldn't ever be because he had walked out of a nerd-girls daydream. It was something else, and they'd tried to figure that out between them. But even in the land of dreams things fell apart.

She was lucky. She knew she was. They'd fallen apart in surprisingly adult, respectful ways. She...she hadn't expected him to actually be at the Penthouse when she started packing her things. They weren't mad at each other! They didn't hate each other ('least, she hoped so), she just took it as some weird unwritten post break-up rule that he wouldn't be there. And that this would be a lot easier to do.

In the night, wait up for you
Even though you don't want me to
Go to bed, leave the lights on
What's the use


She told him about the job offer back home she took. She figured it'd be good, you know? to get out there and see the..uh...world for a bit. She tried to make it easier for both of them. A peaceful parting. A fond farewell. An oh-well-hey-we-tried. She thinks she did well. She thought it would be easier.

It wasn't.
But both of them managed to say goodbye like grown ups. When Risa thought back on it, she thinks it was the hardest thing she'd had to do.


_____________

P R E S E N T




"Did you have a good Christmas?" Pause. "Did you even have a Christmas?"

"I worked," he admitted.

"Un. Accept.Able, sir!"

"And it's acceptable when the holidays only remind me of you and being alone for them is **** So I spent them working."

( Record skip. Thought stop. Heart flail. Flip-flop. Fist-in-chest. Broken heart cartoon sound effects. Hopeful heart glissando. Inward caution. )

"You could have asked me," not angry. Not reproachful, either. Genuine.

"It would've hurt too much," he admitted, looking at her for a long moment. "I'm not going to stand here and pretend to know whether or not you're okay with it - with you being there and me being here - but I know I'm not." A shoulder rose and fell before he reached up, drawing off the sunglasses. For a second, his eyes tightened at the change in light. Yes, the split was amicable, but that didn't mean that he...didn't feel the loss of it. It was ...."It's like having lost a tooth," he mused.

"It came out and maybe it didn't hurt too bad at the time, but I keep poking and prodding at the hole because there's something missing. And for me? That's hard."

She'd never had to excuse herself to go cry in the bathroom before. But there was a first time for everything in her life. She'd never heard him say something so raw and honest it had made her crumble worse than a granola bar.

She ached.
It was such a good ache.

_____________


"Would you ever consider going back out with me again?"

Fear. Don't get hurt again. But, neither wanted that anyway. Game over? Reload screen. Try again?


She told him she was afraid. A coward.
So she said o.k.


And I never was smart with love
I let the bad ones in and the good ones go
But I'm gonna love you like I've never been hurt before
I'm gonna love you like I'm indestructible*





*The Girl and the Robot - Röyksopp
* Indestructible - Robyn

_________________
"Hi! I'm fat!"
"Noooo, you're beautiful!"
"Oh honey, I said I was fat, not ugly."
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Risa Jones
Young Wyrm
Young Wyrm


Joined: 16 Sep 2007
Posts: 53
See this user's pet
Can Be Found: Rhydin
1636.80 Silver Crowns

Items

PostPosted: Mon Jan 01, 2018 3:09 pm    Post subject: January 1st, 2018 Reply with quote

Today's inspirational journal spread:


On the page after:

Drink lists:
Icer - Cold drinks, likes milk chocolate
Ace - Old Fashioned w/ bourbon, NOT whiskey
Bobby - Irish coffee. Can't remember what he ordered second time I tended? Erase and update here!
Spencer - (was with Bobby) - Irish coffee and??
Calypso - Black Crown Royal
Wesker - Coffee, black. And ?? Can't remember!
Jewell : Mad Fairy Ale and/or tea
Senka: ?? (omg memory is so bad!)
Eddie: No idea! Made him 80 proof brandy with curacao and angostrura and Peychauds bitters on christmas day tho
Sal - Rum? I think he got Cane to get it
Cane - Rum sometimes? And Badsiders
Jakob - Bottle of water
Jamarr - Coffee I think
Asher - Enjoys the Kona coffee, must buy and stash more

Update this when I can! I know I'm missing people I'll get to it. Hopefully. Don't forget! Or, if I forget, try and remember. Uhm. Later! Also- alphabetize this you lazy hooker
Google spread sheet? Maybe?
!
_________________
"Hi! I'm fat!"
"Noooo, you're beautiful!"
"Oh honey, I said I was fat, not ugly."
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail
Risa Jones
Young Wyrm
Young Wyrm


Joined: 16 Sep 2007
Posts: 53
See this user's pet
Can Be Found: Rhydin
1636.80 Silver Crowns

Items

PostPosted: Wed Jan 03, 2018 7:36 am    Post subject: Not That Into You Reply with quote

INTERLUDE III
TWO YEARS AGO

"Can you make that square a little rounder?"

Risa Jones' smile froze in place. Josh had a cup of coffee with the company's logo in one hand and that was pretty much the only way one could identify the company's manager. Behind them, various keyboards were studiously or furiously typed away on; a few people murmured on the phone, a thousand mouse clicks went by as Risa attempted to figure out how--

"They want rounded corners? Or...a circle?" Head tilted at him.
"Yeah, yeah! A little rounder, but still square. Otherwise the client loves the design Riza--"
"--Risa."
"Risa, right!"

Josh, frankly, looked like some sort of hobo Jesus. It was a running gag around the office which tie-dye shirt he'd wear to compliment a scraggly unkempt beard that went half way down his chest and the falling-apart sandals he loved wearing with his khaki shorts. At least he'd gotten the memo sometime earlier that year and started taking showers at work. He jogged, you see. He jogged to work in the morning. And used to get to work covered in sweat. The office was in a bright, re purposed old factory, one wall the original brick, the other floor to wall windows and painted cheery office..uh..white. There were no cubicles. So when Josh used to do that, or any co-worker decided tuna was for lunch...Anyyhooo--at least he'd started showering.

"Sure can do Boss! I'll have it adjusted and sent out with you and Lizbeth copied on it in, say, an hour?"

Josh gave her a thumbs up. "Aweeesome!" And then meandered off through the open tables of computers and workers. Risa didn't need to watch him go to know where he went. His flip-flops slappadappa'd cheerily on his feet.

Across from her, their monitors close enough to touch, Lizbeth's face peered around Risa's work provided acer and grinned. "Can you make that square rounder?" Lizbeth parroted in quiet mockery. Risa snickered like she was four.

"Hey, listen. There's a new coffee shop across the block that opened. Real mom n' pop shop, they roast the beans and package them right in the store, it's smellls like *** heaven," Lizbeth began, "You wanna grab a cup there with me today at lunch?"

Risa drug her eyes away from her monitors and the fifty million windows, emails yet to answer, SEO tools, Google--"*** yeah" Enthusiastically replied before thinking. They high fived over their monitors and went back to work. Risa tried not to worry too much about breaking her New Years Resolution about Learning To Say No, a Risa Jones Special, and tried not to watch the clock.



_______________________________

FLASH FORWARD
Lizbeth wrapped up her stream for youtube. Risa, wrapped in a blanket with a glass of ...she didn't know. Lizbeth liked wine, Risa couldn't stand it, but it's what Liz' had in the fridge and after the night dancing, with her head pounding from too many shots--a little bit of what ailed her should cure her of that distant headache that beat to the rhythm of: you're old. you're old. you never got hangovers. you're old. She knew the stream had wrapped up because Liz' hadn't yet got the sound dampening thingie-ma-bobs for her guest room in the apartment where she filmed and Risa had no idea about streaming but was pretty sure the silence meant she was done.

Lizbeth came out of the guest room in a cloud of raven dark hair, make-up flawless. As usual. Risa could do her eyeshadow if pressed, remember blush and lip gloss, but Lizbeth? Bow. Down. My god she was good. She had this entire dewy, fresh faced look, full on glow, that looked so much like she woke up like this it turned her head. Of course, no one had beautiful hot pink eyelids with eyeliner sharp enough to cut a bitch either, but it looked soooo good--

"You left something on the floor," Lizbeth grinned at her.
Risa blinked owlishly and looked down.
When she looked up, Lizbeth's perfume tickled Risa's nose, and she had leaned along the back of the couch so that when Risa turned their noses nearly collided.
"--I, sorry you--huh?"
Lizbeth chuckled. Somewhere, a romance novelist was losing their *** because it was the perfect, smokey sound.
"Your jaw." Lizbeth said.

And then she kissed Risa.


____________________________

FLASH FORWARD
"I don't understand. Why can't I--"

Lizbeth's fury was so out of place. Risa had never seen her so upset. "I told you not to *** answer the phone. I told you not to use that voice message of us together. And I told you about *** uploading those pics. But do you ever listen? Of course *** not. Not Risa *** Perfect Life Jones, clueless *** happy go lucky puppy. Do you--"

Risa's first instinct was to be hurt. Tears pin-pricked behind lash immediately. Her second instinct was to lash out blindly and say some nasty ***. Risa knew better than that, and that she was better than that. So she didn't. But swallowing it felt like eating glass. "Hey, hey, calm-Lizzie what is going on?"

"I'm not into you, this was fun while it lasted, but we're done," Lizbeth said. It was so calm and slipped so easily from her mouth that Risa thought she was imagining things. "Sorry. " Lizbeth rolled her shoulder. Risa was mentally unable to think of anything to say. "Get your *** and get out," Lizbeth told her, composed and cold.

Risa did the only thing she could think of.
She got her *** and got out.
_________________
"Hi! I'm fat!"
"Noooo, you're beautiful!"
"Oh honey, I said I was fat, not ugly."
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